EPIPHANY OF OUR LORD CATHOLIC CHURCH

Liturgical Mess re: Obligations

12/1/2024

From the Pastor:   Liturgical Mess re: Obligations

       Our Lady, under the title of the Immaculate Conception, has been the patroness of our country for longer than most of you have been alive. The first Bishop of the United States, John Carroll, placed the diocese of Baltimore, which comprised the original 13 colonies, under her protection in 1792. By 1846 the number of dioceses had increased, as had the population, and the Bishops, gathered in Baltimore for their 6th Provincial Council, placed the entire nation under the Immaculate Conception’s care. The next year this was approved by Pope Pius IX. The Feast Day of the Immaculate Conception is December 8 and it is supposed to be a Holy Day of Obligation. But this year, since the Eighth falls on a Sunday (next Sunday), the Novus Ordo calendar calls for it to be transferred to the following day, Monday, December 9. And, while you may think that the US Bishops would be pleased, nay, eager, to at least promote that transferred day as a Holy Day, they instead shrugged their collective shoulders and declared that, since the Feast was transferred to a Monday, and they can’t expect people to attend Mass two days in a row {shudder}, the obligation was lifted. Even our Patronal Feast Day wasn’t worth the trouble of taking the day (or even just a few hours) off work, or so it seemed to imply.
       Fortunately for those who attend the Traditional Latin Mass, that whole thing was avoided because in the 1962 liturgical calendar, the Immaculate Conception Feast “trumps” even the Second Sunday of Advent. So on our Sunday calendar we had planned, as the Ordo properly showed, to celebrate the Mass of the Immaculate Conception and join to it (called a “commemoration”) the three proper prayers of the Second Sunday of Advent (the Communion, Secret, and Postcommunion prayers). Monday, December 9, was then to be the normally scheduled feria (daily) Mass of the Monday of the second week of Advent. Until the following happened...
       One of the US Bishops, Paprocki by name, thought that (I am speculating on his reasons, here) it was ridiculous to ignore our Country’s Patroness on her Feast Day, so he asked Rome to clarify. Here is the response, as shown in a news article by Kate Quiñones of Catholic News Agency which is easily accessed online. The Vatican has clarified that Catholics in the United States must still attend Mass on holy days of obligation even when they are transferred to Mondays or Saturdays, correcting a long-standing practice in the U.S. Church. In its complementary norms, the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB) stipulates that when certain feast days fall on a Saturday or Monday, the obligation to attend Mass on that day is “abrogated.” Dec. 8 is typically a holy day of obligation celebrating the solemnity of the Immaculate Conception, but this year the feast day lands on a Sunday in Advent. As a result, the USCCB transferred it to Monday, Dec. 9, according to the 2024 USCCB liturgical calendar. In its complementary norms the USCCB does not list the Immaculate Conception as a solemnity to which the abrogation normally applies. Nevertheless, the bishops’ calendar this year stated that “the obligation to attend Mass … does not transfer” to Monday, Dec. 9. Yet the Vatican’s Dicastery for Legislative Texts, in a Sept. 4 letter to Springfield, Illinois, Bishop Thomas Paprocki, stated that all of the feasts in question “are always days of obligation … even when the aforementioned transfer of the feast occurs.”
Paprocki, the chairman of the USCCB’s Committee on Canonical Affairs and Church Governance, had in July written to the Holy See seeking clarification on whether an obligation transfers when the feast itself is transferred. Archbishop Filippo Iannone, the prefect of the legislative text dicastery, told Paprocki that “the feast must be observed as a day of obligation on the day to which it is transferred.” Iannone noted in the letter that certain feast days are established by canon law as days of obligation. These “must be observed” and “the canon does not provide exceptions,” he noted in the letter. Iannone clarified that if someone is unable to attend Mass for a “grave cause” such as illness or caring for an infant, then they are excused, as “no one is bound to the impossible.” Several U.S. dioceses are already stipulating that Mass attendance is obligatory on that day...
       I will stop quoting the article at this point because, although not mentioned explicitly, Bishop Parkes has sent word to us that in the Diocese of St. Petersburg we will be observing the Immaculate Conception on December 9 as a Holy Day of Obligation and celebrating the Mass of the Second Sunday of Advent on the 8th. TLM communities were, years ago, informed that we were to follow the Novus Ordo calendar as to which days were Obligatory. So for the upcoming dates in question, it seemed that at the TLM we would be celebrating the Immaculate Conception on Sunday yet have an obligation to attend Mass on Monday even though that Mass would not be the one of the Feast! Instead of that weird scenario, I have changed our liturgical calendar at Epiphany to basically follow the Novus Ordo calendar. On Sunday, December 8, we will celebrate the 2nd Sunday of Advent. On Monday, December 9, a Holy Day of Obligation, we will celebrate the transferred Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Another Fine Mess. Oh, wait, that was from just two comedians, not a whole Conference full. (Only the elders will get that reference. Sorry.)

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Where’s Father Emmanuel?

11/24/2024

From the Pastor:   Where’s Father Emmanuel?

       Those of you who attended the TLM at St. Anthony back in the day, as well as those who were at Epiphany when the TLM first started here in August of 2015 will most likely remember Fr. Emmanuel Ndecihiro. He was from the diocese of Dodoma in Tanzania and came to the States to study advanced Mathematics at St. Leo University. I offered him a room at St. Anthony’s rectory and we became close friends over the years. He also stayed at Epiphany for a while before he finally had to return to his home diocese, where he has since been in charge of several parishes, missions, and schools. He has been trying to make it back here for a short break from all that has been heaped upon him and was expecting to arrive here this week. I planned on running this article (from long ago at St. Anthony) for his first Sunday back, both as a memory for him to recall and because I didn’t expect to have much time to write because we needed to do a lot of catching up. Unfortunately, he is not yet able to come, but here is an old story of his first Thanksgiving. Enjoy!

Fr. Emmanuel’ 1st Thanksgiving

    Several weeks ago Father Emmanuel asked me what “Thanksgiving” is. I explained to him about the history of the celebration and that, in practice, it is the most religious of all secular holidays we celebrate. We give thanks to God quite openly on this day, when we seem to be almost apologetic for mentioning God at Christmas or Easter. Then I told him about the great feast he could expect at a typical Thanksgiving meal. After spending the day (following morning Mass, of course) watching football games, drinking wine, beer or soda, snacking on chips, salsa, veggies, fruits and cheese, the real food would come. Turkey and ham, baked potatoes, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, squash, rolls, cranberry sauce, stuffing, salad, green beans and carrots. His eyes were wide as I listed all of the food. (In his limited vocabulary he didn’t understand “turkey” or ‘ham” until seeing photos on the web.) But I hadn’t even gotten to the dessert. Apple pie, pumpkin pie and pecan pie, all topped with ice cream and whipped cream. “Wow! How do you eat that much?” he wondered in amazement.
    We simply loosen our belts a notch or two and stuff ourselves more than anyone could possibly imagine. Father’s response was to tell me of feasts in his home village. But there they have a saying that goes something like this: “You can only eat until your stomach touches your ribs.” Boy, would I be in trouble! My stomach passed by my ribs many years ago and does not seem to have any intention of ever going back into its proper place again. Anyway, last Thursday was Father’s first Thanksgiving and he got to celebrate it with my family. You know what craziness is when you read about my family get togethers, especially when I write about them before they occur.
    This year my brother-in-law took his boys out hunting before Thanksgiving and shot a wild hog for the main course instead of the traditional ham and turkey. Father Emmanuel, who grew up hunting for most of his meals back home, thought this was the best way to ensure good, fresh meat and was excited when he saw the large boar they got. It made him a little homesick but I didn’t know what he was going to do to alleviate that down and out feeling. Without telling anyone, he made a blowgun and snare and went hunting himself, as we found out Thanksgiving afternoon. We were roasting the pig in a large pit after burning logs down to hot ash and at one point Father Emmanuel placed his surprise catch in with it when nobody was looking. Not realizing there were hunting seasons and regulations, he had gotten up early in the morning and caught a wild turkey. He cleaned it and seasoned it and placed it into the firepit and waited with great excitement for our reaction when we would finally eat.
    Fast forward a couple of hours and dinner was ready. All the fixin’s were on the table, the first couple of football games were over and everyone was called in to eat. The boys had retrieved their hog and sliced it up nicely but when they did, they noticed a foul odor that they couldn’t quite place or explain. Meanwhile, Father Emmanuel had stealthily removed his turkey from the pit and kept it off to the side to spring on us once we were all gathered at the table. Once we said grace he asked us to wait and he brought in his surprise. It was a beautiful bird, with golden brown skin looking like something from a Normal Rockwell painting. But it was also the source of the obnoxious odor. As we would find out in just a little while the odor was so pungent that it permeated even the boar it was cooked with and made it inedible. The aroma was not from the spices he used. And the bird was, indeed, very fresh, yet it still smelled very strongly of what we now recognized as week old road kill. Father learned a very valuable lesson on his first Thanksgiving Day. There is a big difference between a turkey and a turkey buzzard.
    At least we still had vegetables to eat.

With prayers for your holiness,
Fr. Edwin Palka

November 14th, 2024

11/14/2024

From the Pastor:   A New Look!

       This week the church will be in a bit of turmoil but for a very good reason. The morning Masses will be held in the social hall and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament will be moved to the rectory chapel. Confessions will probably be heard there as well. We shall see as it all plays out. We have a Nuptial Mass scheduled for Friday afternoon, so the church will have to be put back in order before the wedding and the bride and groom will be the first to experience the new look. Many of you already have a general idea of what the wall behind the altar will look like when we are done, for we have had a rough mock-up of it hanging in the office for several months now, plus some rough sketches of the artwork in the sacristy for anyone interested enough to take a peek at. But most of you will probably not be aware of what has been in the works for quite some time. A world-renowned artist, who just happens to attend Mass at Epiphany, has offered to loan us a crucifixion scene and two large angels as a triptych to be displayed as long as we are allowed to celebrate the TLM here. The style is along the lines of that of the great 15th-century Dominican Friar and artist, Fra Angelico. I think you will be quite pleased with it. We will have to do some more work later to fully incorporate it into the church, but this week at least the first stage will be completed.
       While we are working to bring beauty to the church, giving even more glory to God and edification to His people, such is not the case in all parts of the Church. The Vatican has announced a new “mascot” for the Church’s 2025 Jubilee Year. “Luce” has blue hair, is dressed in a yellow raincoat and hat with green galoshes splattered with brown mud, wears a rainbow rosary around his/her/its neck, and carries a witch's stang-like walking stick. Her (how are we to know what gender this thing has? Do they expect us to all be biologists?) eyes have pupils shaped like scallop shells (the symbol of those who have completed a pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela). She has several friends, Fe, Xin, and Sky (all of which sound like trans pronouns), and a dog named Santino (“little Saint”). This/these figures are the work of an “artist” whose company’s anime-inspired toys include plenty of “pride” toys and (ahem) “adult” toys in the form of child toys. It is presumed that Rupnik was unavailable for the job. I have two serious questions for those who dreamed up this mascot idea. 1) If you really think that a toy pilgrim is going to evangelize the young, couldn’t you have at least found an artist who is not already known for scandalous “works of art”? 2) Or was scandal, rather than Faith, the whole “hidden” idea behind your choice?
       Going further into things that don’t glorify God or edify His people, this week (as I write this article, not as you read it) the Bishops of the United States are gathered for their Fall meeting. What is on their agenda? I do not know. But something reportedly not on their agenda ought to be a priority for them: Catholic hospitals have been performing mutilations on children in the name of “trans therapy.” How many? According to the National Catholic Register, “As the Register reported last month, on Oct. 8 a medical watchdog organization called Do No Harm released a database finding that about 150 Catholic hospitals in the United States provided “pediatric sex-change services” between 2019 and 2023, including 33 Catholic hospitals that performed so-called gender-reassignment surgeries on minors... More than 520 minors received treatments in Catholic hospitals in about 40 states during that five-year period, according to the data. More than 150 had surgeries to alter their appearances to resemble the opposite sex, while more than 380 children were given puberty blockers or hormone therapies.” Make no mistake about this, not a bit of this gives glory to the One True God but rather makes a mockery of Him. None of this actually edifies His people, even those mentally ill enough to claim that the children benefit from doctors “correcting” God’s “mistakes.” Every parent, doctor, nurse, and other “official” involved in these actions should be judged in this world, not just in the next. And the Bishops (who have all been made aware of the above-mentioned report), for the sake of their own souls, need to immediately remove the “Catholic” moniker from any hospital doing such evil and excommunicate all “catholics” involved, from the hospitals’ top dogs (even if—no, especially if—that means excommunicating all of the Religious Sisters who officially own and/or run so many “catholic” hospitals) down to the “ethics department” staff as well as those actually doing the dirty deeds. And the parents who subject their children to such mutilations of both body and soul. And the politicians who champion such causes. And the list goes on...
       Those “catholics” who think that the above examples of ridiculousness and sickness are real Catholicism will hate the paintings going up at Epiphany this week. To them, the crucifixion of Jesus is a stumbling block, for they are, at best, looking for salvation without the Cross, without the Savior, without God.
       In the coming weeks you will have an opportunity to hear from our faithful Catholic artist an explanation of the who’s, what’s, and why’s of his work. You will be edified. God will be glorified. Epiphany will be beautified.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

The Polls are Closed. Mostly.

11/10/2024

From the Pastor:   The Polls are Closed. Mostly.

       Now that the 2024 elections are finally, mercifully over (at least in most states, although Arizona is still trying to gin up another 18 million past last minute democrat votes), I will say a few words about them. I am glad this stage of the lying is finished! The new stage of lying to the people is just about to begin but at least this segment of it has come to an end. Well, that’s enough politics. I told you it was only going to be a few words.
       This Monday the nation celebrates Veterans Day. Most years I attend some sort of Veterans Day celebration and listen to politicians giving boring historical talks to groups who know more history of—and have more experience in—war, peace, and being in the military than the blathering politicians do. Yet I go anyway. I figure it’s kind of like you continuing to sit through my sermons, except that I don’t do this every week! This year I planned on attending the Transgendered War Heroes of the Past, Present, and Future medal of dishonor ceremony but it has been canceled because all of the presenters will still be pouting, weeping, mourning, and making Primal Scream videos due to the election results and can’t come out of their safe spaces. It’s just as well, since the... oh, wait, it seems that I almost slipped back into the political realm once again. My apologies. Let me start anew.
       On Monday the Church celebrates a famous Saint who was also a military Veteran, but in the ancient Roman army, rather than ours. Martin of Tours is best known, perhaps, for the story of one cold winter day when he encountered a beggar who was freezing for lack of proper warm clothing. Martin had nothing to give him but the shirt off his back, or, rather, his military cloak. He cut it in half, keeping one part for himself and giving the other half to the poor beggar. He later had a vision of Jesus wearing that half of his cloak. Our Lord, speaking to the surrounding angels, stated, “Martin, yet a catechumen, hath clothed Me with this garment.” Yes, though he practiced Catholicism with great love and devotion, he had not yet been baptized! Young Martin had been raised by pagan parents but in his youth had encountered Catholic priests and hermits and had desired to give his life to “the God of the Christians” as he called Him. By the time he was finally brought into the Church, he was already quite familiar with Her teachings and customs and desired to be a hermit himself. After leaving military life, he continued his study of Catholicism under Saint Hilary, the Bishop of Poitiers, France. Eventually, he was able to witness his own mother (but not, unfortunately, his father), seven cousins, and two great-uncles received into the Church. Bishop Hilary (which is a man’s name, by the way, but let’s not get back into politics) ordained him to the minor order of Exorcist though he could not at that time convince the humble Martin to accept Major Orders. It was as an Exorcist that he first came face to face with demons. He became quite skilled at fighting them off and the more he defeated them the more they attacked. Soon he was given his own demon to pester him, much like God gives us our own guardian angel. This fallen angel was quite powerful and capable of transforming into various shapes. He often appeared in the form of pagan gods, of women, and of beastly animals. The more this devil tormented Martin, the more resolved he was to drive all the demons away, and he destroyed many pagan temples. Soon he was able to see the demons around him, which helped tremendously in his fight against his own demon as well as those afflicting others. His holiness kept increasing with each fight and soon he was performing miracles, including raising several dead people back to life.
       When the Bishop of Tours died, the people clamored for Martin, who had by then founded two famous hermitages, to become their next Bishop. He humbly declined. Not many days later, though, a man came out to his hermitage and begged him to come into the city to care for a dying relative. It was all a ruse, and, as soon as he arrived, a group of Bishops who had been called in for this purpose ordained him Bishop of Tours. So many men of old were ordained against their will as the people insisted on having holy Bishops! Oh, what a difference from recent decades when unholy men clamored for this position in order to enter into demonic activity without earthly consequences and without fear of God and His eternal punishments for such evil doings. St. Martin, wanting nothing to do with being a Bishop, battled heretics and demons while increasing in and spreading holiness, while in this day and age those who desire to be Bishops embrace heretics, make pacts with demons, and want nothing to do with holiness! Sadly, this is the kind of Bishop many (most?) Catholics seem to want today. Oh, how we need St. Martin's intercession!
       Men, if you would like to know more about this great Saint, come to the Martinmas celebration put on by the parish’s Fraternity of St. John the Apostle. It begins Monday evening at 6:00. I am not privy to the plans for the evening so I can’t tell you any more details but each presentation that they have sponsored has been well worth the time. Plus, the food isn’t half-bad, either!

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Resumed Sundays After Epiphany?

11/3/2024

From the Pastor:   Resumed Sundays After Epiphany?

       It has been quite a few years since I wrote about the “Resumed Sundays After Epiphany.” In fact, I can’t find an article about them in all of my Epiphany bulletin article archives, so it may have been before the TLM came here that I last wrote about it. These “resumed” Sundays show up in our 1962 liturgical calendar near the end of the Church year if needed. What? If needed? What in tarnation does that mean? I’m glad you asked! The Church year begins with the First Sunday of Advent. Advent leads to Christmas. Christmas to Epiphany, which is still part of the Christmas Season (at least until January 13—The Baptism of the Lord, or February 2—His Circumcision and His Mother’s Purification, depending on which author you read). The “Time After Epiphany” includes 6 Sundays pointing us toward Lent, which prepares us for Easter, which is a movable feast that can fall between March 22 and April 25. That variation means that Lent, based on Easter’s date each year, sometimes overlaps with the weeks After Epiphany. In the old calendar, the Season of Lent includes three Sundays (Septuagesima, Sexagesima, and Quinquagesima) before Ash Wednesday. At the beginning of this liturgical year, Septuagesima fell on January 28, the date upon which the Fourth Sunday after Epiphany would have fallen had Easter been later than it was. So we “skipped” the 4th, 5th, and 6th Sundays After Epiphany. But the total number of weeks in a year hasn’t changed, so the early Lent means that we run out of Post Pentecost Sundays before we run out of calendar!
       This conundrum is fixed by “resuming” where we left off in Epiphany time. Since Lent, Easter, Pentecost (50 days after Easter) and the Sundays After Pentecost were three weeks “early” we simply celebrate those skipped Sundays near the end of the year, although the final Sunday is always the 24th And Last Sunday after Pentecost. That last Sunday falls on November 24th this year, so, counting backward, the Resumed Sixth Sunday after Epiphany falls on November 17, the Resumed Fifth Sunday after Epiphany falls on November 10, and the first one skipped, the Fourth Sunday after Epiphany, shows up on the calendar this week, on November 3. But wait! There is a “catch” this year. November 3 we are celebrating the External Solemnity of our Diocesan Patron Saint, St. Jude, whose actual feast day (along with St. Simon) fell a few days ago, on October 28. The old calendar allows us to celebrate “External Solemnities for special feasts on either the Sunday before the actual date of the feast or on the Sunday immediately following it. These special Feasts include the Patron Saint of the Diocese, as just mentioned, the Patron Saint of the parish (in our case, not a Saint per se but a Feast in and of itself, Epiphany), and other special days that you have already experienced, such as Our Lady of the Rosary, the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and Corpus Christi.
       Of course, just celebrating a Mass whose readings and prayers were chosen and composed specifically for the time after Epiphany would leave us without a proper continuity of the Post Pentecost theme. So Holy Mother Church, without consulting me about it (for I would have probably said to just “make up” a few extra Masses to fit these slots, while She chose the “waste not want not” approach) decided many centuries ago that for the Resumed Sundays, we would use the same Collects, Epistles, Gospels, Secrets, and PostCommunion prayers of the skipped Masses after Epiphany but that we would use the Introit, Gradual, and Communion antiphon of the 23rd Sunday After Pentecost in place of the “normal” ones each Resumed week, thus “recycling” the Masses but changing the “theme” enough that it more appropriately fits the “end of the year/life” theme of this last part of the cycle. Does that make your head spin? Try finding it in your hand missal and you may be truly confused, for it sends you back to pages that send you to still other pages which also send you to other pages, which you keep turning until you get frustrated and just set the missal down! The Angelus Press missal (the small black one in the pews) gives a handy chart to explain all of this on page 814. If you can figure it out by following the chart to the pages of the pages of the pages it sends you to, you are a genius-level missal master! As for the rest of us, we are grateful for the External Solemnity of Sts. Simon and Jude so that we have one less Resumed Sunday to deal with!
       And, while we are on the subject of confusion, we have just had an update on the Sunday, December 8 Holy Day of Obligation (The Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary) that was transferred in the new calendar this year to Monday, December 9, and which our USA Bishops then told us is not a Day of Obligation because it falls on a Monday: Rome just stated that it is indeed a Day of Obligation even if transferred to Monday and that the US Bishops should follow Canon Law instead of making up their own rules. I’ll explain more about that later, as it affects both old and new liturgical calendars this year.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

St. Jude, All Saints, All Souls

10/27/2024

From the Pastor:   St. Jude, All Saints, All Souls

       This weekend in the Traditional Calendar, Sunday is the feast of Christ the King. This important feast won’t be found on the New Calendar until November 24. The New Christ the King (which falls on the last Sunday of the liturgical year) used to be the date upon which the Bishop of St. Petersburg bestowed the St. Jude the Apostle Award. But a few years ago he switched the award ceremony to the TLM date of Christ the King, which is always the last Sunday of October. You might remember that we used to have a Eucharistic Procession after the Mass of Christ the King until the change came. But it is too difficult for me to have a procession and still have time to get to the award ceremony to accompany those from our parish who are to receive the award, so we had to cancel the processions. The first year of the change they didn’t inform us in time to cancel the procession and I missed getting to the cathedral on time.
       For the sake of anyone new to the diocese, this annual award is given to one person (or a married couple, for the two are one flesh) in each parish. There are always people who do exceptional things in the parishes without getting much recognition for the hard work they put into their ministries or activities—except, perhaps, negative recognition from those who didn’t do the work complaining that it wasn’t done the way they wanted it done! Each year the pastor has to make a difficult decision to nominate someone, although many “someones” may truly deserve to receive the award. This year I am happy to announce that Richard and Deborah Owens are going to receive the St. Jude Award Medal from Bishop Parkes. Both of them are involved in too many activities to list, including the Catholic Enrichment weeks to the Troops of St. George, Knights of Columbus, Sunday coffee and donuts, Holy League, and many other things. Please congratulate them and offer a prayer of thanks for all they do!
       The actual Feast Day for St. Jude the Apostle (our diocesan Patron Saint, in case you didn’t realize his significance) is October 28 on both the old and new calendars. We celebrate his feast day along with that of another Apostle, St. Simon. Because he is our Patron, we are able to celebrate (according to the rubrics of the TLM) an “external solemnity” for him on either the preceding or the following Sunday for the sake of the Faithful who are unable to attend on the actual feast day. So next Sunday the External Solemnity of Sts. Simon and Jude will take the place of the Resumed 4th Sunday after Epiphany, although that feast will get its own commemoration, that is, we will include the Collect, Secret, and Post Communion prayers of that Sunday Mass after those of the two Apostles. The “Resumed” Masses are extremely difficult to follow in the hand missals and I don’t have enough space here to even explain what they are, let alone how to follow them, so just be glad that you have one fewer to be lost at this year!
       The end of this week also, lest you forget, contains a Holy Day of Obligation. Friday, November 1, is the day we show our respect and admiration on the feast day dedicated to All Saints. It is one of the few remaining days upon which it is obligatory to attend Mass outside of Sundays. The following day, Saturday, November 2, is the Commemoration of All Souls. While not a day of obligation, it is one of the most beloved and well-attended Masses regardless of which day it falls. I expect that the 8:00 am Mass will be packed! The Adult Catechism class that I normally teach after Adoration on Saturday mornings has been canceled so that we can have our annual Soul Cakes & Cider Celebration at that time. Due to the chaos caused by the hurricanes this year, we currently have only about half a dozen lists of souls to be prayed for at that Mass (and for the rest of the month), but it is not too late to get yours in!
       Also, remember that the whole month of November is dedicated to the Holy Souls, and the Church offers an octave of Plenary Indulgences to kick off these special thirty days of prayer for the souls in Purgatory. Each day from November 1 through November 8 (inclusive) those who visit a cemetery and pray, even if only mentally, for the departed can receive—to be applied to the Poor Souls—a Plenary Indulgence, that is, the complete remission of all temporal punishment due to previously forgiven sin. Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domini, et lux perpetua luceat eis. Requiescant in pace. (Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual Light shine upon them. May they rest in peace.)
       Lastly, our Mass Book (for intentions for 2025) will be opening soon. Once again, with the larger number of parishioners clamoring for Masses (as it should be!) we are dropping the number of Masses each family can request to 5 (five). The Mass stipend donation, according to the diocesan standards revised a dozen or so years ago, is $20 per Mass. Watch for the official announcement. The book fills up within days.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

In The Aftermath

10/20/2024

From the Pastor:   In The Aftermath

       I wrote my last article as Hurricane Milton approached. I sent it to be published several hours before we lost electricity but didn’t know if it would ever be printed. I spent the night of the storm sleeping in a recliner downstairs since it was cooler there than upstairs. It was also a place where I could hear the storm winds howling just outside the windows lining the room. At some point in the tempest, the sound of the carport being destroyed caught my attention enough to wake me up. I got up and tried to see what was happening but it was too dark to see anything, even though it was only a dozen or so feet away. The morning light would show that half of the aluminum top had folded back onto the other half of the roof. Through the grace of God and His angels, the two cars parked under the remaining now-double-roofed section were virtually unscathed. There were tree limbs down throughout the property. The avocado trees didn’t fare too well. Same with the Jackfruit tree. We gave away all of the avocados to the people in Epiphany Arms. There were also a couple of jackfruit that hadn’t been clandestinely taken from the tree (yes, people stole our jackfruit just before they got ripe—we never harvested a single one ourselves. I almost put up a sign saying, “Eve stole some of God’s fruit and look at the results!”) so they were sent next door as well. The back section of the parking lot was flooded up through the third row of parking spots and the water continued about halfway down the driveway toward the rectory. (During Hurricane Irma in 2017 the water reached the handicapped parking spots, so this was not quite so bad, except that this time it took days, not hours, to recede!) The carport outside the social hall kitchen was scattered in pieces from the back of the building to the front along with pieces of what later proved to be the roof of the storage shed next to it. I moved enough of the tree limbs out of the way that cars could enter the parking lot. Anders sang the 6:30 am Mass for the two of us and five people were present for the 8:00 am Mass that morning.
       The people who were here for morning Masses helped move a lot of the debris out of the way so that people could safely enter the church, for which I am extremely grateful. Later, the Troops of St. George arrived and took care of the majority of the heavy labor. They, along with the Knights of Columbus and other men are still assisting widows and shut-ins in clearing fallen trees at their houses and doing all sorts of repairs as needed whenever we get word that a parishioner needs help. What a blessing! Our staff has also been outstanding, helping coordinate relief efforts and checking on everyone we could think of who might live alone or need extra assistance. It was only late Thursday morning (October 17) that our phones and internet finally came back, so all the phoning and messaging was being done via cell phones, making everything just that much more difficult. I am also edified by the contributions of cash and gift cards made by a number of our parishioners to be given to other parishioners in need. It is humbling for anyone to have to ask for assistance but so far we have been able to meet the needs of which we have been made aware. In the unread bulletin from last week, I wrote that two out-of-state pastors had inquired as to our needs, offering assistance from their own parish women’s clubs and Knights. May God bless their generosity even though we have not needed to take advantage of it! If you or someone you know still needs help but have hesitated to ask, please reach out to us. Help is at hand.
       During all of the hustle and bustle, we received our first list of names to be prayed for on All Souls Day. What? Already? Yes, already! Although the hurricane prep and cleanup from two hurricanes have occupied our minds, time, and energy these past weeks and the “normal” stuff like making prayer lists for the souls in Purgatory have taken a back seat, it is still good timing for this feast. After all, we have seen or heard of so many people who perished in Helene and, in lower numbers, thanks be to God, in Milton, it reminds us that we must all die sometime of something and we must always be prepared spiritually to meet our Maker. Let us, who survived, remember to pray for all of those who didn’t make it through as well as remembering our family and friends who have passed away over the years. Bring a long list. Time is short! There will be only one more Sunday before All Souls Day by the time this October 20 bulletin is published.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Hurricane Milton

10/13/2024

From the Pastor:   Hurricane Milton

       With hurricane Helene’s damage still in our faces hurricane Milton roared ashore. I wrote about my Aunt Irma stopping by to try to analyze the last hurricane, acting like it was a science project or a game. After seeing all of the devastation left behind, she learned her lesson without needing a truckload of equipment to tell her anything. As soon as the news showed Milton to be a category 5 hurricane, she called to tell me that she would be monitoring it from Kansas.
       I am writing this on Wednesday afternoon, while the rain is still not too heavy and the winds not too strong. A lot will change in just a few hours. I expected to have to squeeze in time at the priest convocation to write this but it has been canceled. Some of my family evacuated to Alabama. Others went to South Carolina. My brother-in-law is staying with my mother. My dad is staying with me. Many parishioners have checked in to tell me that they are in safe places. A friend in Ohio offered to take in anybody who needed a place to evacuate to. A priest who was supposed to come here this weekend to celebrate Mass had his plans change. He was bringing his mother to Florida to take a short vacation on Anna Maria Beach and was going to hear confessions and celebrate Mass here before heading out to the island. Of course, Helene made that impossible, so he instead had been looking for a place in Jacksonville to take his mother instead. Milton made even that sensible solution not a good solution, either! The ever-joyful Carmelite Sister Immaculata was also supposed to come visit us this weekend. Fortunately, she was able to cancel her plans in time. She will make it down later when it is safe.
       A priest from Ohio called and asked me to let him know if anyone here needed financial support due to damages beyond what they could handle. His Women’s Club is offering to raise money to help, so if any of you need it, please let me know. Many other priests from around the country have contacted me offering prayers as they hear about the hurricane. Evidently coverage is extensive not only in Florida but far away as well. As I got to this particular place writing this article, another priest, this one from Michigan, also reached out to offer direct help if anyone needs it! Amazing!
       As I continue writing I keep getting further information regarding the storm. It is now moving faster. It is now moving more northward. But the 5:00 update shows the expected track bringing it ashore still a bit south of us, maybe hitting Bradenton/Sarasota instead of straight up Tampa Bay. That should keep our storm surge a good bit lower. But only time will tell. As for me, I am still praying it away. Winds are currently about 20 mph and the rain is coming in a little more consistently but still not too heavy. My brother-in-law is keeping a good watch on the Hillsborough river which is a few blocks downhill from my mom’s house. Currently it is about 3 feet from cresting. Even if it moves up another 10 we expect that mom’s house will be fine. But they can come to the rectory if we have misjudged it. On the other hand, if something happens to the rectory, we can move over to her house, so we all have backup plans. If the electricity stays on, mom’s place will probably have better food! If we can’t cook, my stock of Spam, sardines, and canned chili will probably make the rectory the better diner. Of course, mom may differ on that latter option! At this particular time, the retention ponds between us and Epiphany Arms are full but the water hasn’t yet intruded into our parking lot. No doubt it will soon but it used to flood with every afternoon thunderstorm. It never got up to the church sidewalk or into the rectory so I don’t expect it to tonight, either.
       Tornadoes have been observed throughout the whole of the southeastern part of Florida. Seeing them on the FDOT cameras has been amazing and is helping to keep me grateful that they are not happening here.
       After quite an interruption for dinner I am back to say things are looking good. I don’t know if we will get this bulletin published this week so I don’t know if you will ever read it. We still have electricity. Currently (7:13 pm Wednesday) the winds have fallen off for the moment. The worst is still to come but it shouldn’t be too bad. After all, your prayers have been powerful! Thank you each and every one and thank you Blessed Mother!

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

From the bishop, not the pastor!

10/6/2024

DIOCESE OF ST. PETERSBURG
Office of the Bishop

October 2, 2024

“Our help is in the name of the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth” (Psalm 124:8).

My Dear Brothers and Sisters,

All of us are heartbroken by the scenes of destruction in our communities. Even worse, lives have been lost from the effects of Hurricane Helene. The days that followed revealed shocking images of streets, homes, and churches flooded throughout the Diocese of Saint Petersburg. If you have suffered a loss, I am sorry, and you are in my prayers.

Longtime residents say they have never experienced this type of flooding. In the Diocese of Saint Petersburg, the communities most affected are situated along the Gulf Coast, Tampa Bay, and our rivers. You have probably seen the images of damage and destruction, but you may not have seen the homes of our priests and religious sisters that have been flooded. These humble servants are striving to minister to their communities while also seeking temporary shelter. The street in front of my St. Petersburg home was flooded and utilities were shut off for a time. Fortunately, I found temporary shelter at the Nazareth House, a summer home for seminarians, and I was joined by priests whose rectories were flooded out.

So far, we have determined that 12 of our Catholic schools and Early Childhood Centers have sustained damage to their buildings or properties. Two are significant. 18 Catholic churches or their properties have been damaged by wind or water. Pinellas Hope and Tampa Hope, our Catholic Charities homeless shelters, experienced damage, flooding, and power outages, and the residents were displaced. Some of our Catholic Charities affordable housing units were also flooded. The reports are still coming in and we continue to assess the damage.

So many of our brothers and sisters in Christ have lost everything.

While we pick up the pieces of the broken lives in our midst, we also turn to our Lord and trust in Him. We are alive and have much to be grateful for: the many blessings He continues to bestow upon us. We thank God for the gift of life and the gift of a new day to love and serve one another.

We are grateful for those parish teams who had minimal damage and are now stepping forward to help lead cleanup events in their neighborhoods, opening their doors to serve as shelters, or providing comfort to those who are grieving.

If you feel led to share a blessing with others, I invite you to give to our Diocesan Disaster Relief Fund. Since 2017, the fund has provided nearly $2 million for disaster recovery efforts. Now we will help our local communities in need. Please visit dosp.org to make a donation.

Thank you for your generosity and may God bless you! Sincerely yours in Christ

Most Reverend Gregory L. Parkes
Bishop of Saint Petersburg

Hurricane Edition!

9/29/2024

From the Pastor:   Hurricane Edition!

       Monday afternoon my sister texted me a strange question. “Are you going to bring Dad back to your place on Tuesday?” What? Why? On Tuesdays, I go to visit my dad. We usually go out to lunch and then grocery shopping and perhaps to Home Depot or some other place to pick up anything he needs around the house. But I don’t bring him back home with me. So why the question? “Because of the storm coming on Wednesday.” What storm? I hadn’t heard of any storm. But, sure enough, there was one scheduled, almost as if the meteorologists could simply flip a switch and create one. Oops, that sounds like conspiracy theory talk! A weather system was strengthening into a possible hurricane and it was heading into the Gulf of Mexico. I got the details about it the next day from Dad. It was heading past us and up into the Big Bend area of the panhandle. Not aiming for us, so no need to evacuate. Whew, that’s a relief. If anything changes, let me know and I’ll come pick you up, I told him, and that was that. Until the next afternoon. He lives in a mobile home and Pinellas County issued a mandatory evacuation. So I went to get him. My sister was evacuating to mom’s house with her husband, daughter, and a niece. And a couple of dogs. And a cat. Dad was coming to my place. All was well. Until Aunt Irma showed up.
       Everybody with common sense was leaving Florida’s west coast if they were able to and here she was coming in. Just for the storm. Literally. It turns out that she has a new hobby: meteorology. She wanted to be in the midst of the storm so that she could try out all of her new equipment. I was praying the Mass prayers “To Avert Storms” and she was hoping that the storm would turn in and hit us directly. Hotels were already booked due to the evacuations so she needed a place to stay. Mom already had people sleeping on the floor, plus Aunt Irma didn’t want to have to deal with all of the animals. She couldn’t stay with Dad since his park was evacuated. So she arrived unannounced to stay at the rectory. She was as giddy as a schoolgirl. “Help me get everything set up,” she happily greeted me, “before the bands of rain get here.” She had boxes of things that were all shiny and new. Like so many people who get a new hobby, she spent a small fortune on things that she thought she might need “someday” but she had never had a chance to actually use most of them. She had thermometers to check temperature changes and barometers to measure the atmospheric pressure. Another box held various types of hygrometers so that she could measure the humidity of the air and ground. Anemometers, both handheld and with mounting contraptions so that she could measure wind speed, came out of the pile next. Of course, she had rain gauges to set up just about everywhere to ensure a good reading of the copious amount of rain that was sure to come. We unwrapped both a wind sock and a weathercock, which didn’t make any sense to me until she showed me how she was going to fly a drone in the storm and needed to have a measured airspeed and direction so that she could control it as well as possible.
       When I opened the next box, I was stumped, for I had neither seen nor heard of this weird contraption. It was a Present Weather/Precipitation Sensor. It consisted of a heavy pole with a u-shaped top piece upon each end of which a radar gun-like device pointed toward the other one. It was a measuring tool to determine what kind of precipitation was falling (rain, hail, etc.), how large the droplets were, and maybe a bunch of other stuff. She had a transmissometer to measure the visibility (how far you can see through the storm/fog/whatever, and even a ceilometer to measure how high/low the cloud ceiling is. If the local weatherman had something, so did Aunt Irma! Yes, she had it all and then some.
       We set everything up in about 3 hours and then waited. A small shower came by while we were doing all of this and didn’t yet have it set so that she could record it. But then nothing. Wind gusts of about 14 mph were the most exciting thing. Yawn. “But the TV weathergirls/guys insisted that this would all start Wednesday evening,” she cried. Sadly, we barely got a drizzle all night long. She stayed awake the whole time but Dad and I went to sleep. She was still manning the helm the next morning, buzzing on her third pot of coffee, when I went to celebrate the morning Masses. Sunshine and a slight breeze greeted me upon my return later that morning. She was frustrated and fuming and tired and cranky. But she persisted. All day we watched the wind blow but a strong breeze certainly wasn’t worth the trip to Florida. The TV was showing flooding and wind on Bayshore and other places nearby, yet Epiphany stayed dry. She climbed up on the roof to try to spot something—anything—but soon came back down dejected. No storm. Finally, late Thursday evening, it started to rain a little bit. But there was Aunt Irma, after being awake and excited for nearly two full days and nights, sound asleep. We carried her to bed and tucked her in without her even stirring. Maybe next time she’ll get to experience the storm...

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

The Latest CMA Update

9/22/2024

From the Pastor:   The Latest CMA Update

       After looking over the latest Catholic Ministry Appeal update this week I want to share some thoughts with you. In case the name of the appeal doesn’t ring a bell, it is the Bishop’s fund drive that pays for the various ministries of the diocese. It replaced APA, the Annual Pastoral Appeal, a couple of years ago. When Bishop Parkes first introduced this new appeal, the priests wrongly assumed that it was just a rebranded APA, which itself was just a rebranded BAPA (Bishop’s Annual Pastoral Appeal). We were quite pleased when we discovered the differences. The APA “goal” for each parish, for instance, was a mandatory amount of money that the parish was required to either raise through appealing to the parishioners or, falling short of the goal by those efforts, take from the parish savings account. Due to the way the APA goals were calculated, if a parish appeal fell short and had to be paid from savings, the subsidized amount was essentially “taxed” twice through a long and impossible-to-verify taxation (or goal-setting) formula. The diocese needed the money, we were told, and they were going to get it one way or another. The double taxation encouraged parishioners to donate to APA so that their money was only “taxed” once. Behind the CMA was a new strategy aimed at encouraging the Catholic generosity of the parishioners to shine forth brightly and voluntarily rather than threatening them with a cudgel. The administrative costs of running the diocese were taken out of the Appeal (and are now paid for with a flat tax on our collections) so the CMA now only funds the “charitable” and “ministerial” activities of the diocese. If the diocese’s overall goal isn’t met, the Bishop said that he will take that as a sign that the people don’t want to support what he is offering and, rather than take money against their will, he will simply cut the programs the people don’t want to support. Gasp! It was hard to believe that he would cut the funding for pro-life activities, prison ministry, the Marriage Tribunal, Vocations programs, Seminary Education, and so many other great programs we have traditionally supported as a diocese. But he gave his word. He trusted that the goals would be met when people of faith were given choices as to where their hard-earned money would best be put to use. Catching more flies with honey than vinegar, and all that stuff.
       And how, you may ask, would he tell which programs the people wished to support and which they did not wish to support? By allowing them to choose which specific ministry they desire their money to go to when they donate. If you go to our parish webpage you can scroll down on the homepage and click on the CMA link. On the page that opens up, you can see many of the ministries financed by the diocese through this appeal. Once you then click on the “make a gift” button you can specify to which ministry you would like your donation applied. Targeted donations like that are legally and morally to be used only for the specified purpose. If the ministry you wish to support does not appear on the drop-down menu (the menu would be too unwieldy to list every single ministry) you can check, “I don’t see my ministry, please contact me” and they actually will do so! Of course, you also have the option to allow the donation to be given “unrestricted” so that it can be used to fund any of the diocesan ministries in need.
       Under this new system, if a pastor gives his “best effort” to reach the parish goal yet falls short, the bishop will neither take the remainder of the “bill” from them nor penalize them the following years in any way, shape, or form. If the “best effort” was not exerted, however, all bets are off the table. I have written about this before when the bishop questioned my “best effort” at Epiphany. So far this approach has worked on a diocese-wide scale. But for some reason, it has not done too well at this parish. We eventually meet our goal but with minimal participation. The last two years this was understandable since we were (and still are) threatened with having the Traditional Latin Mass taken away from us and that has a tendency to reduce one’s generous tendencies. But, as mentioned last week, Bishop Parkes has done all he can to support us and protect us from those in Rome who seem, to put it mildly, to dislike people who attend the TLM. If calamity strikes us, it is certainly not Bishop Parkes’ fault! Supporting the Bishop and financially supporting his/our ministries, is just plain Catholic. It seems to me that everyone should be able to find at least one charitable ministry within the diocese that they can willingly support, even if they cannot send in thousands and thousands of dollars.
       Yet, as of this being written, only 18% of Epiphany households have donated to the CMA this year. We have reached 67% of our goal, which means that those who have donated have been very generous and I thank you very much for that! But how about the rest of you? I know, inflation is high and your wallets are light. Those in worse shape are often the ones receiving help from CMA. Don’t know if the Bishop will spend the money “correctly”? Does your boss withhold your pay because he thinks you are wasting it? Are there really any good reasons not to give at least a small gift, like the widow’s mite? We should all support Church ministries out of love of God and love of neighbor. Consider making a cheerful, charitable gift.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Confirmations Are Coming Quickly!

9/15/2024

From the Pastor:   Confirmations Are Coming Quickly!

       This upcoming year brings uncertainty to Epiphany. You are all aware of the efforts of some in Rome to shut down the Traditional Latin Mass. You are also aware that Bishop Parkes continues to fight on our behalf to keep not only Epiphany parish going but also the other two parishes in the diocese that offer the TLM. In March of 2023, Bishop Parkes obediently wrote a letter to Cardinal Roach making a case to keep the status quo in the diocese and his plea was (relatively) well-received. In July or August of 2023, he was granted a 2-year “indult” to continue the celebration of the TLM in all three parish churches with the possibility of asking for an extension of that indult when the two years are up. In the meantime, the TLM at all three parishes has kept growing even as other parishes struggle to keep congregations from declining too sharply.
       Bishop Parkes has been striving to find a solution to this strange situation, for he sees a sizable minority of his flock finding solace and holiness in the form of the Mass loved and cherished by centuries of both Saints and (non-canonized) saints. He understands that we are not just “in it for the nostalgia” for he sees the overall youthfulness of our congregations, those who are not pining for something they grew up with (since they were born long after the change from one Mass to the other) but are rather those who have discovered the treasure-trove of riches comprising the ancient Mass after perhaps never having heard anything positive about it in their lives. “The priest had his back to the people, nobody understood what was going on, and the little old ladies fingered their rosaries,” is all that most people under 60 ever heard regarding the Tridentine Mass and, hence, never gave a second thought to it. That is, until they happened upon it for whatever reason, and fell in love; in love with God, for His love for them and their new-found ability, inflamed desire, and even the realization of the necessity to love Him in return is what the “old” Mass showed them so clearly. They knew as they had never known before Jesus’ perfect act of love for all men, the Holy Sacrifice of His Life upon the cross for our eternal salvation. And they loved right back, immersed as they were in the whole experience of the soul-moving liturgical ritual that had been honed for nearly two thousand years. These groups want to stay in that place at the foot of the cross, Adoring Him and offering their lives back to Him, a place they arrived at by spiritually entering into His Most Sacred Heart through the Traditional Latin Mass. And the bishop wants them/us to be able to do so. And he doesn’t want the Sword of Damocles hanging over our heads, always threatening to fall and wipe out the TLM at the whim of someone who has never even visited the diocese, let alone met the people. He is still diligently striving to come up with a way to give the TLM long-term (perpetual) stability. But, alas, so far all possibilities have shown dire and unintended (on his/our side, anyway) consequences, making them not worth pursuing unless/until forced into a corner.
       With that being said, it is apparent that we don’t know what the future holds for us and, although we all hope that things will continue as normal, I have made the decision to move Confirmations up a few months earlier than we have had them in the past, just in case the sword does fall this spring. I petitioned the Bishop to allow us to have our Confirmations in February this coming year. Mark your calendars. Wednesday, February 12, at 7:00 pm, Bishop Parkes is scheduled to come to Epiphany to confirm, using the 1962 ritual, however many children have been properly prepared to receive this important sacrament. His schedule is even more grueling than mine and, although it is on his calendar at the present moment, we have seen in the past that it may change and either we will change our date/time to accommodate him or else I will be given delegation to bestow the confirmations in his place on the above scheduled day and time. Either way, it is imperative that: 1) the children start their confirmation preparation immediately if not sooner; and 2) everyone who is planning on being confirmed that day fill out the information sheet we have on our website so that we know how many people to expect. I cannot stress this enough. In the past we have often had children signed up only at the last minute. This year, the bishop wants to know (already!) how many are being prepared. I must give him a number, so you must tell me ASAP if you want your children included.
       If the worst case scenario occurs, March of 2025 (two years after the letter asking permission to keep the TLM was written by Bishop Parkes) will bring news that the current TLM indult will not be renewed. If so, the February Confirmations may be the last time the old ritual is used for this sacrament. I pray that it will not be so, but I would rather not take the chance, hence the early Confirmation date. As always, if you need help preparing your child(ren) for this sacrament, let me know and we will arrange whatever assistance is necessary. For those already doing the preparation through Catholic homeschool programs, you may need to step it up a bit, since the curriculum may be expecting a full school year (an extra couple of months) to get through all of the material.
       As always, keep praying for Bishop Parkes.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

What Is So Special About Monday?

9/8/2024

From the Pastor:   What Is So Special About Monday?

       Monday, September 9, is a big feast day, one that long-time Epiphany members (and readers of Fr. Z’s blog) know quite well. But for any newcomers, you might be unaware of the special celebration that is upcoming. Sure, it is St. Peter Claver’s feast day. I certainly don’t want to downplay that. In fact, I will celebrate two morning Masses dedicated to him, so important is that Saint. It is also the feast day of St. Gorgonius, although he will only receive a commemoration at St. Peter Claver’s Masses. But the special day of which I make mention is not the feast day of a Saint at all. “Then what is it?” you may ask, and I will gladly tell you should you do so. So, go ahead and ask! Ah, that’s better. Yes, I will gladly answer your most earnest inquiry, but first, sit down for a minute, and let’s open a couple of cold bottles of Alaskan Smoked Porter.
       What’s that? You’ve never tasted that particular brew? Join the club, for neither have I. I have a description of it, which I will share with you in just a minute, but it is in the tasting that the truth will come out. Whether or not it lives up to its advertised wonderfulness, we will have a delightful time praising it or criticizing it, offering thoughts about it and comparing it to other beers, perhaps even to other food and drink, and spending a bit of time together just doing something we are not able to do very often, namely, a lot of nothing. Yes, there is much to be said for doing nothing of any discernable import. To be able to set aside the “necessities” of the day, to be able to trust that we are not indispensable, that the world will survive without our input for an hour or so, that God, not man, is in control of everything, and that He gave us the very inspiration to produce such a delightful beverage to be shared among friends and family. But I said that I was going to give the official description of the beer, not the description of what we would do with it, so here you go. “Crafted with malt smoked over alder wood, Alaskan Smoked Porter showcases a unique and intriguing smoky character, akin to a campfire’s embrace. This robust porter carries notes of toffee and caramel, offering a delightful contrast to the smokiness. It truly shines during fall camping trips, adding a touch of the Alaskan wilderness to your outdoor adventures.” Smoked malt? It sounds like anyone who enjoys a peaty scotch will enjoy that part of it. Toffee and caramel? Let’s face it, somebody’s tastebuds have got to be seriously messed up to turn away at the thought of those flavors. Camping and campfires? Is it pure marketing? Absolutely! But I’ve already bitten. Let’s pop it open.
       No, it’s ok. I understand. Not everybody likes such a flavor bomb in their beer. You say you would prefer something else? I won’t hold that against you unless you ask for a Bud Light. Thanks for being upfront about it instead of fighting through a beer you won’t enjoy. I, myself, though generally preferring porters and stouts, willingly order just about any type of local beer if I am traveling. After all, I can get a Guiness anywhere in the world. But if I were to visit Arizona and found a light-bodied Cactus beer, I would gladly give it a shot. But, then again, I like darn near any food, so it makes sense that I enjoy, or at least tolerate, most beer and other drinks, too. The fruity beers, like Grapefruit beer from Florida or Blueberry beer from Michigan, are not my favorites, but having one or two every couple of years isn’t beyond my comfort zone. So what can I get you? How about a Maine Lobster beer from Bar Harbor? Ha, ha. You should’ve seen your face! Nah, I’m just pulling your finger... I mean, your leg. But if you want to try something a little off the beaten path without going either too dark or too light, how about an Avocado Honey Ale? “The beer has a light golden haze appearance with an ivory frothy head. Moving to its aroma, the beer shares a biscuity and nutty aroma with hints of sweetness reminiscent of wildflowers...Additionally, it has a super smooth and silky texture that further makes the drink mouthful and appetizing.” No? I’ve got just the one. Do you remember sweet breakfast cereals with the little marshmallows? Check out the description of this beer. “Saturday Morning IPA is a soft, light, and mouthful beer that knows how to satisfy one’s taste buds. The drink has a soft pillow body made using the following: Toasted marshmallow; Dehydrated Marshmallow; Calypso and Galaxy Hops. All these ingredients are united to give a sweet cereal taste to the drink with hints of orange/pear mixed aroma.” You’ll try it? Wonderful!
       Now that we have that settled and we both have a beer we’ve never tried, let’s get ready to have a blast critiquing them together! But before we take the first swig, I need to (finally!) tell you the reason for this get-together. In case you have forgotten or, poorly catechized Catholic that you may be, were never taught, September 9 is Buy A Priest A Beer Day!
       Alas, because I don’t have free time anymore, the above conversation about drinking such beers is just wishful thinking. But next year this feast falls on a Tuesday, which, after the morning schedule of Masses, confessions, and Adoration, I generally take off. Perhaps with a bit of advanced planning, we could make it happen. Start searching out your favorite (or weirdest) brews!

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Edwin Palka

The Final Last Vacation Story

9/1/2024

From the Pastor:   The Final Last Vacation Story

      The story of my recent journey left off before I made it back home, so you are stuck with yet another tale of my trip. After the long detour and blocked road from last week, I finally made it to North Carolina where the Carsons had invited me to visit them while they were spending time in their mountain cabin. As I left off last week with the delay causing me to either arrive after dark or spend a night in a hotel, I opted for the hotel. In the morning I had a cup of coffee and sat down to pray my breviary as I drank in both the mountain view and the coffee between scripture verses. It was a good way to start the day.
       After getting back in the car, I let the Carson's know my approximate arrival time. I checked in with them about an hour out and it seemed like in no time the GPS lady was telling me to turn off the main drag and onto a small, steep mountain road leading up to their house. The distance left to travel wasn't exactly making sense relative to the time it was saying it would take, but I was to find out soon enough why it would take so long. As I mentioned before, I am glad I didn't attempt this part of the trip at night, for even in daylight it was a tough drive. The road was very, very twisty, very, very narrow, and very, very steep. The going was very, very slow. And then the GPS lady got lost. She wasn't showing me to be exactly on the road and didn't warn of forks in the road demanding a decision of which way to turn. At one point the paved road was going left and a gravel road went right and she said nothing. I chose pavement. Up, up, up I went, the whole time thinking, "If I had a cabin up here, I would take a year's worth of food and never venture back down until I was ready to leave." This paved part of the “road” ended up being a driveway. There was no place to turn around so I followed the drive right up to the front door of the house and continued past it as it looped back down. I waved just in case somebody with a shotgun was watching. Going back down I had the Honda in low gear and the GPS girl found me before I got to the gravel road. "Take the other road this time, you big dummy!" she screeched. So I turned. Up and up and around and around I went, this time on wet, loose gravel. Then I came around a tight turn and had to hit the brakes when I came face to face with a four-wheel drive All Terrain Vehicle, which also slammed on its brakes. It was driven by the Carsons, who were coming down to make sure I found the right road. They put their vehicle in reverse but it simply spun the tires and started sliding sideways toward the edge of the mountain. Not a good sign. They finally got it moving in the right direction—backward—and found a small place to pull over and motioned me to pass. I, too, spun some gravel but the tires soon caught and up I went, the transmission and engine straining as they have never strained in Florida. I certainly knew why GPS said it would take so long for such a short trip.
      The Carsons make this trip up and down every single day, for they never miss daily Mass. They have memorized the Mass schedule of parishes in various distant towns to which they travel since none of the parishes has Mass every day. I, on the other hand, was very happy to be able to celebrate Mass in the cabin and stay put. Of course, that was not to last long, for they insisted on showing me around. We went to the top of the mountain in the rain on the four-wheeler as they talked about how they almost went off the edge the other day in the exact same conditions. Back home once again, we saw their "pet" woodchuck that lives just down the hill from the house. We watched a multitude of hummingbirds fighting incessantly over the feeder and flowers. I heard about how a bear completely destroyed their apple tree this year, the first year it produced apples, never to be capable of producing fruit again. And they drove me (in their four-wheel drive SUV, not the ATV) all the way down the mountain and into various small towns to show me where they went to Mass, where they shopped, and where they hiked. There is a parish that has a TLM and they are just starting to clear the ground to build a new, beautiful church. Our Lady of the Mountains in Highlands is worth checking out online. We also watched people swimming in "Bust Your Butt Falls" right off the main highway in Highlands. The Carson’s know how it got its name, for others from our parish have visited them and one of the girls busted several body parts there. We also went hiking to some waterfalls and came back drenched in sweat and gasping for air, though the temperature was only about 80 degrees. Go figure!
       Finally, after much too short a vacation, I had to head back home. The rest of the return trip was uneventful, with the exception of a major thunderstorm on I-75 just outside of Tampa (yes, I took the interstate the last day). And that really does bring me to the end of this series of articles. How was your vacation?

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

One Last (?) Vacation Article

8/25/2024

From the Pastor:   One Last (?) Vacation Article

       Yes, this is the third week you have to read about my vacation. I wasn’t even gone two weeks, yet I am managing to drag it out at least on paper for longer than it lasted. Anyway, here goes. Last week I left off by saying goodbye to Kentucky and hello to Ohio. I have some friends there whom I have known since before I was a priest but I haven’t seen them in many years. How many years, you ask? This time I got a chance to meet their grandson who, now that school has started, just entered into the third grade. It is the first time I have met him, for I haven’t seen his mother (who I knew from her birth) or grandparents (the friends I mentioned) since before he was conceived! Fortunately, old friends, even when they are distant, are still good friends, and we simply met as if we had never been apart. One notable thing we did, which shows how much of an old geezer I am that I think it is a notable part of my vacation, is take the boy to the local library. Not to read books, for libraries have evolved past that quaint purpose, but to create things with Legos. This was a very child-friendly library and one of its regular activities is a Lego hour for the youngsters. They all piled into a room where they had access to tons of Legos and could not only create anything their imaginations could conjure but also then leave them on display with their names and descriptions of the creation for the whole library world to admire. The descriptions were absolutely necessary, for I would have never known what most of them were even once they were “completed.” Of course, there were some general trends. Boys made machines and robots. Girls made houses, trees, and flowers. Or so the descriptions stated.
       Unlike when I was growing up and the only things we could check out of libraries were books, over the years libraries started offering videos and then other non-readable things. At the local Seminole Heights library wifi hotspots seem to be the most popular non-book item and there is a waiting list a mile long to borrow one. At this particular Ohio library, along with wifi hotspots (all of which were already checked out—it must be a trend), they had a whole wall full of musical instruments, camping gear, science lab tools (microscopes, telescopes, and related items), sports equipment, and more, all available to be checked out. But in a separate spot, there was the largest collection of all: bakeware. Muffin tins, bundt cake pans, cheesecake pans, and other things that you may not need regularly were all lined up for patrons to take home, use, clean (I hope), and return. But the most amazing sight was the row after row of specialty cake pan molds. You could take home a mold for baking a cake in the shape of Batman, Wonder Woman, a rabbit, a castle, a flower, and probably a hundred other things! Does your library have such a collection of items to be borrowed? This one also had tables set up for chess with an invitation to find a partner and play a game, an arts and crafts section complete with scissors, glue, glitter, and “projects” packages. Children, mothers, grandmothers, and a few fathers (and one Father) were all over the place. It was like a theme park without the exorbitant cost.
       Alas, I had to head back south, so off I went, setting the GPS once again to take the backroads to North Carolina. In that section of Ohio, the backroads were pretty straight, flat, and boring. Farmland, mostly with corn and beans, as far as I could tell, went on for mile after mile after mile. One road threw the GPS off with the unexpected sign saying, “Road closed six miles ahead. Use detour.” The next road was miles away and it, too, as well as the next two isolated roads, had the same sign. It took me so far out of the way that, instead of getting there through Kentucky and Tennessee I wound up traveling through West Virginia and Virginia, an unexpected but happily beautiful change to my route. But at one point I was on a four-lane road when I passed by an electric company truck stopped in the middle with a large pole lifting the overhead wires crossing the road. Then I passed another one and another. Every electric wire stretched across the road for miles was being lifted. Dozens more electric trucks kept driving past to lift the next successive line on the road behind me. Something BIG was coming and they were clearing the way. And then I saw the police cars. Everywhere. Blocking the road and the crossroads. And traffic came to a stop. A massive “thing” was being trucked up the mountain in front of me and just as the top of it came into sight over the hill it stopped. For the next hour or more only cars with lift buckets or flashing blue lights moved in either direction. But finally, they let the traffic that had piled up behind this thing use “my” lanes to go around it. For a full hour, the traffic kept coming. Then, for whatever reason, they started moving the Big Thing again and I was allowed to drive toward and then past it. Even seeing it didn’t help me figure out what it was. But it was massive. And the traffic behind it was still backed up for many more miles. I wound up in a hotel that night, not wanting to drive mountain roads in the dark. And, boy, was that a good call...

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Sanders Kentucky At Last!

8/18/2024

From the Pastor:   Sanders Kentucky At Last!

       Following up on last week’s tale of adventure, my driving days continued through the mountains heading mostly northward. When I was finally getting close to the Hernandez’ house, I had just turned onto their road when Kevin called. “Great timing! I just turned onto Snort Wallow Road (or something equally strange),” I answered through the speaker as the phone automatically picked up for me. “Then you should be only a few minutes away. I’ll stay on the phone to guide you through,” came his reply. We chatted a bit and then he asked, “When you got to the fork in the road, did you stay to the left?” I didn’t recall coming to a fork in the road. “You should have seen it by now,” he said,“Are you sure you are on the right road?” Heck, I’ve never been there before. How would I know if I’m on the right road? I’m just blindly following the GPS. “I’m on Snort Wallow Road,” I replied, “How many of them could there be?” Of course, I was in Kentucky, so there could be a couple of dozen, for all I knew. “Have you seen the old cars sitting in front of a house up on the left?” or something like that, the conversation continued. But I wasn’t seeing anything of what he was describing, so he asked me to tell him what I was currently passing. Note that I was on a very narrow, twisty road winding through the wooded hills, not on a highway or anything like that, and it is supposed to be the road he lives on, so it would seem like he would know it pretty well after living there 8 months, but he was stumped as to where I was as I described a huge red barn on the left, followed by a shack on the right, and so forth. “You should be seeing thus and so,” he said, confused as to where I was, “and we don’t live that far off the road from where you turned. This isn’t making sense. I’m outside watching for you but you should have been here by now.” That wasn’t too comforting. After the GPS fiasco earlier in the trip, where it wouldn’t take me by the back roads, maybe it was now playing a joke on me by having me on the wrong little country road. When I told him I saw Punxsutawney Phil run across the road, the thought went through my mind that maybe I wasn’t even in Kentucky, for he replied, “I’ve never seen a groundhog out here,” Fortunately, at least that one woodchuck actually does live there, for soon afterward I saw Kevin by the road, his back to me, staring intently in the other direction. I was coming, not from the highway that any normal person would be coming from, but from the long way from nowhere! I got to see parts of his road that he had only been on a few times himself, for there was no reason for him to travel in the “wrong” direction to get anywhere!
       It was a good thing that he was standing out there, too, for the GPS pointed to the house next to the drive that actually took me to his house. And, even once on the proper drive, I would have stopped at his garage thinking that it was his house! You wouldn’t believe that garage/barn of his. The man who built it made it look like a little cottage rather than a garage and the disguise worked quite well. That building and the actual house stood at the top of a series of rolling hills, a beautiful sight to behold. Cheryl, of course, had a garden growing and the folks they bought the property from had planted apple, pear, and peach trees as well. Those, plus some hazelnut trees (I have never seen any of those before!) were all showing forth the great soil of the land. Of course, I was there to see Kevin and Cheryl, not the greenery, so I didn’t really pay much attention to all of that until later when they took me on a tour and showed me the various things growing right in front of the house. Later still we would walk their property. Down the hill. And over the next one. And around the bend. And past the creek. And through the woods. Oh, what a spectacular place!
       Over the next several days I did a lot of nothing with them. Cheryl wanted Kevin to take me out to do things, to entertain me. But I was content to go nowhere. In the morning I would sleep in (what a great thing all by itself!), celebrate Mass and pray the Breviary, then spend the rest of the day putting together a puzzle, talking, watching the deer consume their fruit and rabbits destroy their vegetables, and sitting on the cool, mosquito-less porch watching the sunset. I did go out to Salvator’s boarding school when they had an open house and I saw and blessed the Rosendale’s new fixer-upper house which is (coincidentally?) within sight of that same boarding school, although they would not arrive until a few days after I left. We also visited the Castle and Key distillery near Frankfort (there are a lot of distilleries in the area including Buffalo Trace, Woodford Reserve, Whiskey Thief, Heaven’s Door, Bulleit, Old Crow, Jim Beam Old Granddad, Four Roses, Wild Turkey, and too many others to list. Holy League field trip, anyone?).
       After a few days of much-needed rest at their place (and they said to tell everyone here they said “hello”) it was time to visit some friends I’ve known since before ordination. Northern Ohio, here I come!

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Some Time Away

8/11/2024

From the Pastor:   Some Time Away

       Some time ago I wrote that Fr. Vincent generously offered to come and take my place for a while so that I could get a short vacation. I asked for suggestions as to where to go. The first suggestion I received was a great one: Blairsville, Georgia. It has been many, many years since I visited that small town but I thoroughly enjoyed myself when I was there. One time was in autumn and I was able to attend their Sorghum Festival. The days were cool, the nights were cold, and the festival was typical small-town fun. Good memories. But this time, before I had even looked for a place to stay, I got an email from some former parishioners who moved to Kentucky last year, the Hernandez family. “When we left we told you that you are always welcome to come and stay with us. The invitation is still open. We have plenty of space and a beautiful view of the hills.” So, although I was already dreaming of the hills of Georgia, Kentucky won out.
       I started planning my trip on Google Maps on the computer. I decided to take a leisurely route, staying off all interstate highways and traveling through the backroads into the Smokey Mountains. I told Kevin that, if he didn’t mind my lack of definite plans, I would just drive until I wanted to stop along the way and wouldn’t set a particular day to arrive. He was fine with that, so off I went. My first stop was in Lake Wales just outside of Orlando. Fr. Marshall was back in Florida visiting his mother and taking care of her for a while as her husband had died and she needed some assistance. We had a great chat and caught up on all sorts of things. He said to tell everyone that he misses you and prays for you daily. Toward late afternoon I said farewell to them and resumed my trip. Instead of using Google Maps I entered my destination into Waze, set it to “avoid highways and tolls,” and trusted that it would do what I programmed it to do. I was wrong. After driving for more than an hour it told me to get on Interstate 75 heading north. Strange. I knew I had told it to avoid highways. But Waze is pretty good at recognizing closed roads and detours, so I reasoned that maybe this was just a temporary thing. Sure enough, as soon as I got on the interstate it told me to exit at the next exit. I exited but at the bottom of the ramp it told me to get back on the interstate. Nope. I pulled over to check out the planned route. I should have done that earlier. It showed me taking I-75 all the way to Kentucky and getting off each exit and then immediately getting back on. Only a computer can be so moronic as to think that that is the proper way of following the “avoid highways” command. I unclicked the “avoid” boxes. It took me on I-75 all the way, with no exiting. I clicked the “avoid highways” box again and it took me all the way on I-75 but exiting and re-entering every off- and on-ramp. Nothing I did could get it to change. So I went back to Google Maps (both are owned by Google, by the way) and, sure enough, found that app working properly. I also concluded that I had gone quite a long distance out of my way to get to that stupid interstate that I was trying to avoid in the first place. I would have been better off with a real map! Maybe next time...
       By now it was time to eat and get a hotel and I was still in Florida. I sure am glad I didn’t plan my route step by step and make hotel reservations in advance, for I was quite content to just call it a day and be happy about being wherever I found myself. I slept for about 10 hours that night and was worried that I wouldn’t be able to sleep too well the next night. I shouldn’t have worried about that, either, for I slept for 9-10 hours each night for the first five or six days of my trip! In the morning I checked Waze and it still wanted to direct me to interstate highways getting on and off and on again. I still haven’t figured that out but haven’t bothered checking it since.
       Most of the time I took back roads that led from one tiny town to another and every once in a while the navigation system would take me down tiny roads within the tiny towns, roads that I never would have traversed if I was following a paper map. Some of them were delightful. Some were downright scary. But all were part of the adventure. As I said, I wanted to drive through the Great Smokey Mountains so I had to change the destination on the GPS so that Maps wouldn’t bypass that area. I took my time and many times had no clue as to where I was or where I was going to end up, and that was exactly the way I wanted it. It was a very relaxing few days of driving and sightseeing. I didn’t listen to much news (someone told me that Joe Biden was not running again, but that is about the extent of my keeping up with current propaganda). I didn’t respond to emails. I prayed a lot of rosaries. I loved every minute of the journey.
       Next week I will probably write about actually getting somewhere.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

The Scapular of Our Lady of Mount Carmel

7/14/2024

From the Pastor:   The Scapular of Our Lady of Mount Carmel

    Traditionally, on the day children received their First Holy Communion they also received a blessed scapular and were enrolled in the Confraternity of Our Lady of Mount Carmel. Do you remember receiving the scapular at your First Holy Communion? Do you still wear yours? If not, why not? The following is from the old Catholic Encyclopedia regarding this scapular.

    Also known as the Brown Scapular, this is the best known, most celebrated, and most widespread of the small scapulars... It is probably the oldest scapular and served as the prototype of the others. According to a pious tradition the Blessed Virgin appeared to St. Simon Stock at Cambridge, England, on Sunday, 16 July, 1251. In answer to his appeal for help for his oppressed order, she appeared to him with a scapular in her hand and said: "Take, beloved son this scapular of thy order as a badge of my confraternity and for thee and all Carmelites a special sign of grace; whoever dies in this garment, will not suffer everlasting fire. It is the sign of salvation, a safeguard in dangers, a pledge of peace and of the covenant". This tradition, however, appears in such a precise form for the first time in 1642, when the words of the Blessed Virgin were given in a circular of St. Simon Stock which he is said to have dictated to his companion secretary, and confessor, Peter Swanyngton. Although it has now been sufficiently shown that this testimony cannot be supported by historical documents, still its general content remains a reliable pious tradition; in other words, it is credible that St. Simon Stock was assured in a supernatural manner of the special protection of the Blessed Virgin for his whole order and for all who should wear the Carmelite habit, that the Blessed Virgin also promised him to grant special aid, especially in the hour of death, to those who in holy fidelity wore this habit in her honour throughout life, so that they should be preserved from hell. And, even though there is here no direct reference to the members of the scapular confraternity, indirectly the promise is extended to all who from devotion to the Mother of God should wear her habit or badge, like true Christians, until death, and be thus as it were affiliated to the Carmelite Order.
    ...For this privilege declares nothing else than that all those who out of true veneration and love for the Blessed Virgin constantly wear the scapular in a spirit of fidelity and confiding faith, after they have been placed by the Church itself with this habit or badge under the special protection of the Mother of God, shall enjoy this special protection in the matter and crisis which most concerns them for time and eternity. Whoever, therefore, even though he be now a sinner, wears the badge of the Mother of God throughout life as her faithful servant, not presumptuously relying on the scapular as on a miraculous amulet, but trustfully confiding in the power and goodness of Mary, may securely hope that Mary will through her powerful and motherly intercession procure for him all the necessary graces for true conversion and for perseverance in good. Such is the meaning and importance of the first privilege of the Carmelite Scapular, which is wont to be expressed in the words: "whoever wears the scapular until death, will be preserved from hell".
    The second privilege of the scapular otherwise known as the Sabbatine privilege, may be briefly defined as meaning that Mary's motherly assistance for her servants in the Scapular Confraternity will continue after death, and will find effect especially on Saturday (the day consecrated to her honour), provided that the members fulfill faithfully the not easy conditions necessary for obtaining this privilege.
    As regards the external form of the scapular, it should consist of two segments of brown woollen cloth; black, however, is also admissible. This scapular usually bears on one side the image of our Lady of Mount Carmel, but neither this nor any other image is prescribed... Concerning the often miraculous protection which Mary on account of this her badge has granted to pious members of the Scapular Confraternity in great perils of soul and body, there exist many records and reliable reports (some of recent times), to which it is impossible to refuse credence. Like the rosary, this scapular has become the badge of the devout Catholic and the true servant of Mary.

    If you have read this far and are now wishing that you had had the privilege of being enrolled in the Brown Scapular when you were a child, you are very fortunate. This Tuesday, July 16, is the feast day of Our Lady of Mount Carmel. After the two morning Masses I will have an enrollment ceremony for anyone who was not previously enrolled. I will invest you with the blessed habit of Carmel and you will be able to receive all of the graces promised. The information above is, obviously, shortened for the sake of fitting this space in the bulletin, and I highly recommend that before the enrollment ceremony you take upon yourself the simple task of further research into the benefits of wearing this powerful sacramental. That way you will desire it all the more and wear it with great devotion to Our Lady. You may bring your own scapular if you wish or accept the one provided by the parish.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Strange Things In The World And Church

7/7/2024

From the Pastor:   Strange Things In The World And Church

       This week I will start by acknowledging some of the strange things passing as “normal” in the world right now. For starters, Miss Maryland is a male. Yes, he calls himself a “she” (or some other non-male pronouns), and everyone goes along with it, but he is still a he and he stole the crown from a she. The judges, by proclaiming him the winner, devastatingly degraded women and yet everybody acted as if this was some sort of milestone for women. Hogwash. The other contestants were too fearful to openly speak out against his win, though several later did so anonymously, such as this one quoted in The Daily Signal. “A transgender woman gets crowned during the first day of transgender Pride Month?” she asked. “It did not seem like a coincidence. Especially when the owner of the pageant is a transgender woman herself. I was feeling like neither myself nor my fellow contestants had a fair opportunity from the beginning.” Yes, the fix was in and everyone knows it. But it is only “haters” who think that a woman should win a woman’s beauty contest. “Normal” people see nothing wrong with telling some of the most beautiful women in Maryland that they are uglier than a feminized man. At least when men pretending to be women dominate women’s sports it simply shows that males are, by and large, stronger and faster than women. But when males are now called more beautiful than women, we cross a whole new line of nastiness toward females.
       Along those same lines of people pretending that everything is normal when someone unfit wins a title, we just saw something similar happen in politics. Our “staunchly Catholic” President has been openly displaying mental incompetence for quite some time now. The mainstream journalists have done everything possible to portray him as the opposite of what he is and have branded reality as “right-wing” and “conspiracy theory” and other such nonsense. World leaders have had to help him as he wandered off at meetings, he has shaken hands with numerous invisible people, and babbled incoherently on a regular basis, yet even video proof has been labeled, “cheap fake.” Until the recent Presidential debate, that is. Somehow the word got out to all of the immoral (I believe their collective actions, words, and lies go far beyond incompetence) so-called journalists and reporters that they were finally free to say what, until then, only the “haters” said about him, namely, that he is not fit to run for re-election. They still haven’t admitted that he is not fit to remain in office at this time, either, but that is a hurdle still too high for them to leap. But far be it for me to be bringing this up just to point out that Kamala Harris should actually be the current President of the United States and Democrat nominee. I bring it up because as bad as the reporting has been on this topic and as much as everyone around him—including and especially his wife and other family members—are, in my opinion, guilty of elderly abuse for what they are putting him through (and what they are probably putting him on) I am more concerned with what our Bishops have been doing and saying about him, for his mental capacity is robust compared to his grasp of morality.
       People may, in good conscience, argue all day long about just how addle-brained a man can be before he should resign or be removed from his post, but to excuse the grossly immoral positions our President has so often publicly taken and to allow, nay, demand, that he be given Holy Communion, goes beyond the pale. There has been no attempt to hide, whitewash, or deny in any way his public statements promoting abortion at any time and without restrictions of any sort. They are, rather, held up as trophies. The rest of his immoral stances need not even be mentioned, for that one foundational topic—life—should be enough to bring canonical action upon him from his own Bishops, prioritizing his salvation over his re-election. Yet they cover for him at least as much as the so-called journalists did until last week. What will be the “debate moment” that will finally shake them out of their spiritual apathy and allow them to proclaim that The Emperor Has No Clothes (Sanctifying Grace)?
       And that brings us from something strange but purely secular (a fixed beauty pageant) to something strange that is both secular and religious (a “Catholic” President), to something strange that is purely religious, but, since the Catholic Faith should be the underpinning of everything, its strangeness also embraces the secular world even if the world doesn’t know it. I simply name here Pope Francis, Cardinal Zen, Archbishop Vigano, Bishop Schneider, Fr. James Martin, and Fr. Marko Rupnik. People’s reaction to this short list of Catholic clergy will correlate exactly with how they view the above-mentioned “strangenesses.” I need not write a thing about any of them, for their interactions (or lack thereof) are so well-known that everyone can easily label each of them as either one of the “good guys” or the “bad guys” depending on their point of view of “normal.”
       My point to all of this is to remind you that “normal’ is no longer a marker of morality. Unless and until the Church leaders and members return to the true Faith, the world will not be healed. Do your part: stay fully, faithfully, and joyfully Catholic, for today’s “normal” Catholics will not reach Heaven.

With prayers for your holiness,
Ref. Fr. Edwin Palka

July, Dedicated To The Precious Blood Of Jesus

6/30/2024

From the Pastor:   July, Dedicated To The Precious Blood Of Jesus

       Every once in a while it is nice to pray a “new” old devotion. Below I have copied the Short Rosary of the Precious Blood found in the prayerbook Treasury of the Sacred Heart, originally published in 1867 and reprinted in 2022 by Angelus Press. A longer version with short explanations/meditations on each mystery can also be found in the book Blessed be God, first printed in 1925.

V. Incline unto my aid, O God.
  R. O Lord, make haste to help me.
Glory be to the Father, etc.

First Mystery
Jesus shed blood in His circumcision.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and:
  We beseech Thee, therefore, help Thy servants, whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy Precious Blood.

Second Mystery
Jesus Shed blood in the agony in the garden.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Third Mystery
Jesus shed blood in His scourging.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Fourth Mystery
Jesus shed blood in His crowning with thorns.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Fifth Mystery
Jesus shed blood in carrying His cross.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Sixth Mystery
Jesus shed blood in His crucifixion.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Seventh Mystery
Jesus shed blood and water from His wounded side.
Five Our Fathers, one Glory be to the Father, and We beseech Thee, etc.

Then recite the following prayer:

O Most Precious Blood, source of eternal life, the price and ransom of the entire world, refreshment and laver of our souls, which dost continually advocate the cause of man before the throne of the sovereign mercy, I adore Thee profoundly, and wish, as far as in me lies, to compensate the injuries and the barbarous treatment which Thou continually receivest from those, and especially those, who rashly dare to blaspheme Thee. Oh! who will not bless this blood of infinite value? Who will not feel his heart inflamed with love for Jesus, that shed it? What would have become of me if I were not redeemed by this divine Blood? But what has drained the sacred veins of my Lord of His Blood, even to the last drop? Ah! it was surely His love. O infinite love, which has bestowed on us this all-healing balsam! O inestimable balsam, springing from the fountain of an immense love! Oh! make all hearts and all tongues praise, glorify, and thank Thee, now and for all eternity. Amen.

V. Thou hast redeemed us, O Lord, with Thy Blood.
  R. And hast made us a king to our God.

Let us pray.
O almighty and eternal God, Who hast appointed Thy only begotten Son the Redeemer of the world, and wouldst be appeased by His Blood; grant, we beseech Thee, that we may so venerate, with solemn worship, this price of our redemption, as to be protected by its virtue from the evils of this present life, and enjoy eternal rewards in Heaven: Who liveth and reigneth with Thee and the Holy Ghost, one God, world without end. Amen.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Confirming Rumors!

6/23/2024

From the Pastor:   Confirming Rumors!

       The rumors are flying. On July 16, the Feast of Our Lady of Mount Carmel, something either very wonderful or very terrible, depending on one’s point of view, is supposed to happen. What is that? You don’t pay attention to rumors? Good for you! Far be it from me to chastise you for keeping your nose to the grindstone instead of sticking it into other people’s business. But there comes a time when the rumors are so large and so widespread that even those who are trying to just keep their head down and pray get at least a whiff of whatever is coming off of the rumor mill. This is the latest case of which I now write. The rumors are growing. The rumors are spreading. The lips are flapping and the ears are itching. “More, give us more,” the people are crying. And so, with that as the introduction, I will put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard) and confirm the rumor. Yes, it is true. Beyond any shadow of a doubt, it can be told that it will indeed happen. The Jesuit who is at the heart of all of these rumors has made it official, at least to some, that he will indeed continue what he started a while back. And, due to his plans, which I have seen in writing with my very own eyes and so can confirm without hesitation, I will be relieved of my duties as pastor after that feast day of Our Lady. Now, now, wipe your eyes. I can’t tell if you are crying tears of joy or of sorrow. As for me, I can honestly admit that I am happy that it is happening. As a matter of fact, it would have pleased me if it could have happened a bit earlier. I don’t know how I will fill my time. I suppose I will just go into exile somewhere. Maybe I can find a place in the mountains and find a bit of respite from the heat. Or maybe go visit friends and family for a while. I really don’t know yet. But I am open to suggestions if you have any for me. I won’t have to sign checks, worry about the A/C not functioning properly, attend meetings, lock up the church at night, or even answer the doorbell at the rectory. I won’t have a care in the world, or at least not quite so many. Yes, the rumors are true and I will enjoy myself because of that fact.
       What’s that? You still don’t know the rumors of which I write? Why, the rumors that the most notable Jesuit priest, the one and only Father Vincent Capuano, is returning to Tampa on July 16 to take my place for a short stint. Yes, the rumors are true. He will be here, relieving me of most of my pastoral duties, for nearly two weeks. Just as he did last year, he will come for a few days of vacation and for a week of retreat, during which time I will be able to get away for a break. He will take the Masses and perform any necessary tasks while I am gone. I can rest assured that the parish is in good hands while I read a book, go fishing, or just sleep for a few days. So, weep for joy that Fr. Vincent is returning and that I get a break. Weep in mourning that he will only be here for a short visit and that I must return so soon.
       But...but...but... some of you are spluttering right about now, that’s not the rumor I thought you were writing about! Ahh, yes, the other rumor. The one that just happens to be associated with the same date, the same feast day, and may, perhaps, even have the effect of me being sent wandering off with nothing much to do. I really don’t have much to say about that one. I don’t have any inside information so I will learn of the veracity (or lack thereof) of that rumor as it plays out in real time.
       I write about this today because of that strange coincidence of the date, for what comes out in writing from a particular Jesuit on that date could very well lead to all sorts of other rumors if people assume that my “disappearance” was somehow related to that rumored document when it, in fact, has absolutely nothing to do with it. Those rumors (of the document) may prove to be either better or worse than expected or may prove to have no basis of fact whatsoever. I may not know until then what is fact and what is fiction. But, either way, I still hope to take a few days off and enjoy myself to the extent that I can.
       For those of you who have been scratching your heads and wondering “What the heck is he writing about?” and still don’t have a clue even though the article is nearly done, count yourself blessed, for you have truly been spared the rumor mill anguish that is keeping so many people awake at night and will continue to do so for at least a few more weeks. And to all of you still reading this, I simply remind you of St. Padre Pio’s famous and very helpful advice: Pray, hope, and don’t worry.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Cancer Update

6/16/2024

From the Pastor:   Cancer Update

       When I last wrote about my little bits of cancer, (basal cell carcinoma), I had just had my first Mohs surgery done just below my nose. After writing that they had gotten all of the cancer in that spot and that a biopsy later revealed another spot that tested positive, I got a lot of feedback from you. By far the most common was the question, “Are you growing a beard?” Those of you who read the bulletin probably think that everyone else does, too, but I can assure you that many don’t! “Father Scruffy” was completely lost on them. The next most common response consisted of stories of your own basal cell cancer and/or Mohs surgery. There are a lot of you who have had this cancer and this procedure. Here’s the good news they related: Every single parishioner who told me of their own bout with basal cell carcinoma was still alive! (No duh, Father, the ones who died from it didn’t speak with you!) Although one man lost half of his cheek and had to endure both radiation and chemotherapy even after the surgery and a couple of others needed a little bit of extra treatment, most people needed just a simple surgery like the one I had and the cancer was gone. A slightly less common response was the one I was hoping to ward off by explaining what I had and how the doctor was going to take care of it. This was the panicked response of those who just heard (or read) the word “cancer” and worried that I was going to die. Oh, how I wish that were true! Death, glorious death, awaits us all and, as long as we die in a state of grace, it is something we should long for, not fear. Take me now, Lord, if You deem me worthy of Heaven! This world is certainly not worth pining for and it is only getting worse. But, alas, it seems as if I will have to wait for either martyrdom or getting hit by a bus, for the cancer is gone.
       Had my cancer been in a place where nobody would have noticed, I would have kept silent about having it just to ward off such worry. But with it on my lip, there was not much of a chance that I could sneak it by any but the least observant among you. This was especially true when I had to wear the big white bandage for the first day after the surgery, making it look like I was shooting a “Got Milk?” commercial. The same is true now that I have had the second spot taken care of. I went back to the dermatologist on Wednesday and had Mohs surgery above my eye. After the first cutting, the doctor told me that it looked like he got all of it and he stitched me up, had an assistant put several rather large pressure bandages on it, and sent me out to the waiting room. “Even though I think I got it all, you still have to wait until I check it under the microscope to be sure,” he told me. I had to play the waiting game the last time, too, so I knew the drill. Being able to sit in the waiting room and read a book was actually something I was looking forward to rather than dreading, for I don’t find enough time anymore to do that. So out I went with a Kindle copy of Credo, Bishop Schneider’s recently published catechism. I had gotten a copy as soon as I could but still, months later, haven’t managed to make it all the way through. Maybe this time... But all too soon they called me back in. “I’m sorry but I have to cut out some more. I don’t have to make the incision any longer so the scar won’t be any more noticeable, but I have to go deeper,” said the doc. So on to round two. Another shot of whatever painful thing they inject to keep the scalpel from being felt and, after removing all of his nicely tied stitches, the doctor dug in. I think he hacked about halfway through my brain before handing a chunk of meat to his assistant and telling her to take it for testing. (For some reason the name “Abby Normal” popped into what was left of my brain when he said that. Some of you will understand why.) Then he stitched me up once again and gave me the waiting room speech, although he wrongly assumed that I would be disappointed to have to spend more time there. I told him that I hoped he got it all this time, for if he had to cut out the stitches and restitch again, I might start having Young Frankenstein-type scars (get the “Abby” reference now?) from all of the needle holes. He assured me that the scar would be barely noticeable since it was right at my eyebrow line. So off I went to read a few more catechism sections and soon enough heard my name being called once again. This time the girl was smiling. “You’re all clear!” she said, “You just need to keep the bandage on for a day and come back in a week to get the stitches taken out.”
       And that, I hope, is the end of my cancer story. Except the beard...

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Letters and Numbers: APA, CMA, 12K, 129K

6/9/2024

From the Pastor:   Letters and Numbers: APA, CMA, 12K, 129K

       A couple of weeks ago I wrote about the newest numbers available across the diocese showing how many people attend Sunday Mass. It was based on counts taken at all parishes during this past February (we send in official counts every February and October). If you missed it, you can see the results hanging in the social hall. The short of it is that Epiphany continues to grow. This week I want to point out something that goes hand in hand with the increase in the number of parishioners, namely, an increase in the amount of money we are asked to send to the diocese to run programs, pay salaries, train seminarians, and all of the other things that are done on a diocesan-wide level.
       Earlier this week I was rummaging through a file in my desk and came across a letter showing some old Annual Pastoral Appeal goals for years gone by. As you know, APA has now changed names and is called CMA (Catholic Ministry Appeal) and has changed in several ways that take way too much space to explain, but the changes are mostly for the good. One big thing is that the CMA goal is not mandatory to hit as the APA goal was. Rather, the Bishop is relying on the pastors to give their best shot to encourage people to give willingly to pay for the expenses of the diocese. Only if he thinks the pastor is not doing his best will he make that individual parish’s goal a mandatory one. So far it has worked and most parishes have exceeded their goals. People like being able to specify where their money is going and they have responded well. The oldest APA goal I found was for Epiphany based on pre-”resurgence” income, the resurgence of the parish beginning in August 2015 when the first TLM since 1969 was celebrated here. To reach that year’s goal we needed to raise $12,192! Of course, there were only 87 people attending Sunday Mass in February of 2015, which means that Epiphany didn’t have a whole lot of income when that APA goal was calculated. The following year, since we grew exponentially in our first year of becoming Tampa’s Center for the Traditional Latin Mass (we grew to 335 people in February of 2016), our income shot up as well (thanks be to God, for we sorely needed the income to stay open). The next year’s goal was $42,058. Talk about a huge jump! 64 families responded to the Appeal and we raised the entire amount. The next few years our APA goal outpaced our parishioner numbers, for the goal kept growing faster than our parish did, but then in 2020 our attendance numbers took off again. The current CMA goal of $128,653 is based on last year’s income, and our attendance was 875. This year our attendance rose to 912, so I expect an increase in the CMA goal for next year as well. It is good to remember that if the overall income of the parishes in the diocese stays the same or falls but ours rises, our goal will rise even if the diocese doesn’t ask for more money as a total goal. Many parishes these days seem to be losing people and income, though, and at the same time the cost of everything from property insurance to health insurance to electricity is skyrocketing, so the diocese will probably need to raise even more money just to make ends meet. So I fully expect another increased goal next year.
       If you remember, for the last two years Bishop Parkes has called me into his office to say that we were so far behind most parishes in donations toward the CMA goal that he had to assume that I wasn’t putting in my best effort to reach the goal. He was wrong, of course, for we were right on par with our fundraising as it had always been for the old APA. For whatever reason, probably largely because I don’t preach about money every week, most people here have put off giving to the diocesan collection until the last half of the year. And having the guillotine blade hanging over our heads didn’t help instill much good will, either. But, having explained that to him and to you, you all came through. We reached our goal last year and I expect to do so again this year. And this time the Bishop hasn’t called me in, so he must trust you, too! After all, we certainly want to support our Bishop at all times, but especially as he figures out how to keep the TLM going in the future no matter what comes out of Rome. So please remember to write your checks or give online and support our much-needed diocesan programs. You can specify where you want your money to go if you wish, or simply donate and let it be spent wherever it is needed most. Just be sure when you give that you state clearly that you are giving on behalf of Epiphany of Our Lord in Tampa. If you don’t specify, we don’t get credit. An online CMA information and donation link can be found on the homepage of EpiphanyTampa.com. Thank you for your continued generosity to Epiphany and to the Diocese of St. Petersburg.

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Corpus Christi

6/2/2024

From the Pastor:   Corpus Christi

       This weekend, although the traditional feast day was this past Thursday, we celebrate Corpus Christi. In the Novus Ordo Mass, the liturgical calendar doesn’t mention it on Thursday, whereas the Traditional calendar shows it being celebrated on the Thursday following Trinity Sunday and then again on Sunday as an external solemnity. Does any of that matter to most Catholics? Probably not. But it is interesting to some people, at least. The old (previous translation) Novus Ordo Missal says, “Where Corpus Christi is not celebrated as a Solemnity it is transferred to the Sunday following Trinity Sunday.” This sometimes throws the foreign priests for a loop, for they expect that, as important as Corpus Christi is “back home” it should be a big feast day here, too! While in many (most?) countries Corpus Christi is a Holy Day of Obligation, in the US we don’t celebrate it as a Solemnity, therefore, is it transferred rather than repeated in the New Mass. Corpus means body and Christi means Christ, so the feast day is celebrating the Eucharist, wherein is the fullness of Jesus Christ, Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity.
       It was just a couple of weeks ago that we celebrated First Holy Communion at the parish and the children (and some adults!) were all filled with excited wonder at receiving Him for the first time in this Adorable Sacrament. They had all passed my test and knew without a shadow of a doubt that Jesus is fully present in His humanity (Body, Blood, and Soul) as well as in His Godhead (Divinity) in either of the Species (the Consecrated Bread and the Consecrated Wine). Further, they knew that He is fully present even in the smallest particle of the Host or the smallest droplet of the Blood. But, while they were all thrilled to profess their faith when they were showing me that they really believe what the Church teaches regarding the Eucharist, I was later told a story that warmed my heart even more, as it showed that at least one little girl really got it. At the Traditional Latin Mass, the Eucharist is only distributed under the Species of the Host. She received Our Lord with great love and devotion two weeks in a row here but the following week the family was going to be attending a Novus Ordo Mass where Holy Communion is distributed under both Species. She was told excitedly, “This time you are going to be able to receive Jesus’ Blood, too!” Her simple reply showed faith greater than that of today’s average (non-Epiphany!) Catholic. “But I’ve already received His Blood!” She knew that every time she received the Host she received, repeat this after me, the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus Christ. Not just His Body, as if one part of His humanity can be separated from the other two parts and from His Godhead. No, she knew and professed with simple confidence that in receiving under both Species she would not be receiving “more” of Jesus. Oh, if only the rest of the Catholic world would learn from her! Many a well-meaning Catholic has come to the Traditional Latin Mass at Epiphany for the first time and asked the question, “Why don’t we get the wine at this Mass?” They never understand my answer, “Nobody ever receives wine at any Catholic Mass anywhere in the world.” They invariably argue, “We do at my parish!” Our little First Communicant would easily correct them with a statement of fact, “At your parish, you may receive the Precious Blood, which is no longer wine, along with the Sacred Host, but even here we receive—repeat this after me—the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus!” She would, I am sure, further be able to explain how those with severe Celiac disease, who cannot receive even a low-gluten Host, can receive the Precious Blood from a separate chalice that has not had the particle of the Host added to it and they, too, would receive the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus! (I forgot to write, “Repeat this after me,” but I trust that you get it by now.) I wonder if those who (especially amongst the older clergy) call the two Species “bread” and “wine” and think you are somehow getting gypped if you don’t receive both would eagerly distribute/receive from two more “Communion Stations” things like a piece of fruit and a whiff of oxygen if they were told that that is how they can receive even more of Jesus by receiving His Soul and Divinity under those two extra signs. Just think of how many more Extraordinary Ministers of Something or Other we could have gathered around the altar and spread around the church! [“Are you the minister of the bread today?” “No, I have the scuba tank this morning!”] I jest, of course, but if a Jesuit ever gets such an idea in his befuddled brain it might take off like wildfire. Maybe this idea could be taken up in the next Synod meeting. What do you think? Would California or Germany be the first to implement this New and Improved Whatchamacallit?
       So here we are, at Mass on the Feast of Corpus Christi (I suspect that you are reading this during my homily!). The Eucharist, reserved in the tabernacle and confected upon the altar, is—because It is truly Jesus—the source and summit of our Faith. We will have a Eucharistic Procession following the 10:30 Mass glorifying and honoring the Son of God, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. May we all be blessed with and pass on to others the simple and profound Faith shown by the little girl who knows exactly Who she recieves in Holy Communion!

With prayer for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

Do our Stats Tell The Truth?

5/26/2024

From the Pastor:   Do Our Stats Tell The Truth?

       Several weeks ago I had a few moments of “free” time so I finally pulled out the most recent diocesan statistics on Mass counts and posted them in the church social hall. In case you have not yet seen them, below are a few numbers of interest. Before I get to them, though, let me first explain, for the sake of anyone new to the diocese, where we get these stats from. The Bishop asks each parish and mission to count the number of people attending Sunday Masses (this includes the Saturday evening Vigil Masses) every weekend in both February and October, averages the totals, and reports the numbers in a spreadsheet. This gives the diocese an overview of how the populations change in various parts of the diocese as well as in individual parishes. Such information is useful in many different ways, such as deciding when and where new parishes might have to be built, where others may have to be closed (shudder at the thought), or even which pastors seem to grow or wilt parishes at which they are assigned. There are probably dozens of other ways these numbers are used as well. I hope they are used to debunk the foolish notion that “nobody wants the Tridentine Mass”! I know that I have successfully used them in such a way when fellow priests complain that they have nothing but blue haired-ladies at their (Novus Ordo) parishes! Of course, I use the word “successfully” quite loosely, for, although I can present the truth to them, that doesn’t mean they have any belief that my parish is anything but an anomaly. After all, the stats showing that all Traditional Latin Masses have grown over the last 17 years, even during covid, is still seen as nothing but “disinformation” by a sizable portion of the clergy. They just can’t wait for the “bubble” to burst, for the “novelty” of Traditional prayer to wear off, and for people to once again realize that folk and rock music (along with feel-good sermons) is the cornerstone of a good, solid, Catholic “faith experience.”
       Just look at the kickoff ceremonies for the last round of the USCCB’s Eucharistic Revival, the Eucharistic Processions, that just tanked in Minnesota even with two big-name “celebrities” heading the marquee, namely, Bishop Robert Barron and Father Mike Schmitz. Thousands showed up, but they had expected thousands more. Did, perhaps, the thought of enduring the tortuous “praise and worship” guitar music ceremony that went along with the talks keep the other people away? That couldn’t possibly be the case, since that type of “music” and “entertainment” is what “everyone” keeps insisting is what attracts people to the Catholic Church! I am willing to bet that had they promoted the Eucharistic talks by this bishop/priest duo, along with a solemn Latin-schola-led Exposition/Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament before the Eucharistic Procession, the crowds would have exceeded expectations. It’s just a guess, mind you, but we will never find out, for “everybody” is certain that “nobody” wants solemnity, dignity, and reverence in front of Our Lord. Yet the reality is dawning even if they refuse to see it, for those promoting this big Revival’s closing Mass, which will certainly not be Traditional, have already lowered the expected number of attendees by 30,000! And that is with every bishop in the country giving away hundreds or even thousands of tickets! I have no doubt that if they announced today that the closing Mass was going to be a Traditional Latin Mass the numbers would skyrocket overnight. See the annual Chartres Eucharistic pilgrimage for an example of what could be expected. Of course, “those crazy people” making that journey actually believe what the Church teaches about the Eucharist. Sheez!
       But back to the statistics of the parish and the diocese. In February of 2024 Epiphany averaged 912 people attending Mass. That is a substantial increase from the 87 people who were counted in February 2015, six months before the TLM arrived here. It is also a slight increase from last year’s February count of 875. It is a very nice change from the 494 people we had during February of 2020, just before the terrible covid lockouts. As for that last number, this year shows that we are one of only 12 parishes that have finally reached once again the number of parishioners that they had before we told the whole world that dying without the sacraments was perfectly acceptable. Think about that. 68 out of 80 parishes have not yet managed to return to pre-covid numbers. The message was powerful: "You don’t need the Church." Will we learn from this fiasco (and we are counting souls perhaps lost for eternity, here, remember that always) when the next so-called pandemic is unleashed on the world? There was something different at Epiphany during that time, though, as we never lost parishioners but rather kept gaining. I wonder if any statisticians out there can figure out what the reason might be? Brainwashing by the cult-leader pastor? Forced attendance? Hmmm...
       This chart also shows that there are currently 37 parishes or missions with a smaller congregation than we have. In February 2015, again, six months before the TLM arrived, Epiphany was the smallest parish, smaller than even the missions. Our future looks pretty good, too, as you will also see from several charts posted next to the Mass Count chart. For the future of a parish to be bright, there must be a good increase in youth. These charted stats show that Epiphany is “outperforming” the diocesan average, per one hundred parishioners, in both baptisms and First Holy Communions. But “nobody” wants the TLM!

With prayers for your holiness,
Rev. Fr. Edwin Palka

He only shuts up when he is writing!